Snowflake Adoption

A few years ago we pursued fertility treatments, domestic adoption, and international adoption in our efforts to become parents. We considered but did not pursue embryo adoption. When a friend of mine did adopt embryos, I was amazed to learn that the law requires an adoption homestudy to be completed prior to the embryo transfer. I was stunned at the contradiction that a woman at 23 weeks of pregnancy can legally have an abortion while the law treats an embryo that is 3-6 days past conception as a child. I pray that some day all the laws in our country reflect the belief that life begins at conception.

This month they passed a law in Wisconsin that requires a woman to have an ultrasound before an abortion. I overheard college students discussing this once when a similar law was being passed in another state and discovered they had very erroneous ideas as to when a baby's heartbeat can be seen on an ultrasound. Many little lives would be spared if every woman had an ultrasound when contemplating abortion. In a society that emphasizes the value of informed consent in so many other settings, it is mind boggling that some are opposed to the notion of requiring a woman to see what is in her womb before she makes this life changing decision. Similarly, it makes no sense that a school nurse cannot give a student one Tylenol without parental consent, but in some states a child can have an abortion without parental consent.

After trying to conceive for three years, I saw two lines on a pregnancy test for the first time in June 2005. It was such a joyous time until we learned it was an ectopic pregnancy. When that pregnancy came to an end, I received some cards from well meaning friends. Some had written sentiments such as "we are sorry for your disappointment." These came from people who believe that life starts at conception, and yet they were referring to my loss as a "disappointment." If they attended the funeral for an infant or a child, they would not refer to that as a disappointment. Our culture is filled with many contradictions when it comes to babies in the womb. Hopefully you and I speak up on behalf of these little ones whenever we have the opportunity to do so.