For most of my life and up until I married Philip almost two years ago, I was the sole breadwinner in my household, and that burden weighed heavily on my shoulders. As a result of that I have unfortunately developed the habit of worrying about finances and what would happen if something changed with my income. I know that I shouldn't worry, and that God is my provider; at least I say that I know that. I have seen Him provide for me in the past, when things looked very desperate. I have seen Him provide for friends and family members in truly miraculous ways, yet I still catch myself fretting about it in the back of my mind at times.
About two weeks ago, a coworker and I were informed that a computer had determined that our "standard hours" would be cut from 40 to 39 per week for each of us. We could work 40 hours if the work was available, which it usually is (except for the occasional low census), but when we took vacation or sick time, we would only be paid for 39 hours instead of 40. Now I know that this doesn't sound like much, but losing an hour's pay in a week could cause a problem, and if it happened often, it could be disastrous. Naturally, we grumbled about it amongst ourselves, but each of us was glad that they didn't just choose to dock one of us to 38 hours instead, and we were also acutely aware that we fared better than another coworker who had had his standard hours cut from 40 to 32 (same deal for him; he can and does work 40, but is only paid for 32 if he takes a week off or has sick time during the week). Despite my best efforts, I found myself quietly worrying about how this would affect us when hours started to be lost.
Last week my boss had to attend a meeting with her directors, and when she returned she told my coworker and me that our standard hours were not going to drop after all due to some other changes that were happening with another employee (good changes for her as well). Sometimes I wonder if God doesn't look at us and shake His head when we grumble and fret and carry our worries around instead of leaving them with Him. All I know is that He is so good to me!
Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.
Psalm 56:3
Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!
Psalm 34:8
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