Typed Words & Intentions

I was sick & miserable. I got a text. I took it the wrong
way and responded in a, not so cordial, manor. I didn't
have the full picture. I had no idea that the person made

a mistake, I had been sick & in pain for days. The way

it looked to me was very different then what it meant.

The end result, hurt feelings & broken relationship. 

I love modern technology, I do, but I don't like how

impersonal it has become. When two people are typing

words on a screen rather then looking at each other or

even hearing each other, it somehow becomes easier to

type what ever you think in that given moment, rather then

reflect on all the possibilities those typed words could mean.

It makes me think of God's typed words in the Bible. Our

language today is less descriptive then the Greek or Hebrew

of the Bible. Much like writing a blog is very different from

a short text about the same subject. Example; (we) is used for,

what ever. So many meanings could be derived from that

little set of letters. Thankfully we have been given a guide,

the Holy Spirit, who shows us all truth. If we stop, listen, &

reflect on what He may reveal as the meaning of a particular

phrase of the Bible or even a text we received. We may then

have the full meaning of those typed words, and be saved

from a whole host of bad possible outcomes. May God not

only put a guard on my mouth but also any communicative

device used by me, now & in the future.

Seek and Hide

Everyone has those days when it seems like nothing is going right. Sometimes circumstances come whizzing past us haphazardly, while other times we are bombarded non-stop. It is during those times that we need to seek shelter and hide ourselves under the wings of our Savior. The following are some lyrics inspired by Psalm 91 and a link to hear the song played. As you listen, I hope that you can visualize what the psalmist was trying to portray.

Psalm 91- Andrew Smith 1996

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High

Will rest in the shadow

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High

Will rest in the shadow of the Lord

Arrows fly on every side, the terror of the night

But You are my refuge

Perilous the battle, thousands falling at my side

But You are my shield

My God in Whom I trust

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVBGGwuAtgo

Looking Unto Jesus

I was sitting in church where a mother was binking a querulous baby a few rows up.  I'm so glad we are given the grace of the instruction not to be willfully distracted during mass, for the sweet little fellow kept drawing me in.  We have an amazing mural of the risen Christ, and the idea came to me that Jesus had been a baby.  I know this.  We make a big fuss every Christmas about it, but the fact that the Creator of the Universe used to poop his pants isn't something I'd put much thought into. It's worth thinking about.  There are spiritual enterprises where I'm lucky to get my poo in the pants, poo in the pants is a good day.  On those days and in those areas of my life Christ is in his infancy in me.  He is still fully God and all-powerful.  He is still completely present and hard at work, but he is not yet what he will be--in me.  

"I Know"

   Before I had children, when I would see an unruly child in public, I would automatically think what a poor job the parent must be doing. Ignorant, judgemental me.....Then I was blessed to be able to adopt my 5 children, 3 of which have a diagnosis of ADHD. This past week ADHD has kicked my butt and left me exhausted and cranky. Friday was the worst!
   My 7 year old had decided that she didn't want to take her medication, so when I had turned my back she sneaked it out of her mouth and into the trash can. It was hours later before she finally confessed what she had done. Of course by this time she had been in trouble and been yelled at more times than I could count. She flipped and flopped, ran and rolled, jumped an jiggled ALL DAY!!!! Then when the blessed hour of "bedtime" (can you just hear the angels singing?) finally came.....she was wide awake and stayed awake for 28 hours straight!
   Living through the roller coaster of ADHD has caused me to become a pro at recognizing it. Now when I see a child who is unruly, instead of making that same ignorant judgement, my heart goes out to the parent as I want to hug them and say "I know".
   Hebrews 4:14-16 encourages us to hold on to our faith. It says that Jesus understands our weaknesses because He has faced all of the same testings, but did not sin. Because of this, when we run to Him, He will not scold us or turn us away.... He will say "I know" and shower us with mercy and grace to help us when we need it most.

It's Always Like Springtime With You

Ahhh! Spring is finally in the air.  Flowers are starting to appear, birds are singing, trees are budding.  I am thinking of all the weddings that I will be attending, beginning in a few weeks, and several songs based on the Song of Solomon are playing in my head. 
"With you I will go; you are my Love, you are my Fair One.  Winter has passed and the springtime has come." (Dance With Me,  from Paul Wilbur's Lion of Judah album and Jesus Culture's Consumed album) 
"See the winter is past and the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth, and the season of singing has come.  Cooing of doves is heard, the fig tree forms its fruit, and the blossoming vines spread their fragrance.  Arise, come, my darling, my beautiful one.  Come with me, come with me, come." (Arise, from Heather Clark's album, Dark Yet Lovely)

In these songs I hear the voice of Jesus as the Bridegroom, calling out to me to come away with Him; come and spend time getting to know the Lover of my soul more intimately.  Being a newlywed, and still in the "honeymoon stage" of my marriage, you would think that it would be easy for me to do.  After all, I do whatever I can to be able to spend as much time with my husband as I can, which has been challenging the past few weeks because of the craziness of our schedules.  But I make the time for my husband.  Why is it so much more challenging to make time to quiet my soul and spend more time with the Lord?

I am so thankful for His grace.  He loves me despite my excuses, and continues to call my name.  
"Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away." (Song of Solomon 2:13)

Listen, When Spoken To

While pregnant with Sarah, my husband worked in the coal

mines of WV. I took care of the house & checkbook. As I drove to

"town", I intermittently took my gaze from checkbook to road, in

order to get the paperwork done before arrival at the bank. A thought

crossed my mind, pull over to the side, then do the checkbook.

I knew it was the Holy Spirit & I thought back, well if I do that I

won't have enough time to get to the Holy Week Services, do You

want that? A few moments later, more sternly, pull over, then do

the checkbook. I was like, "I don't have time, O.K."? Another few

min. & sharply, "PULL OVER NOW". "NO, I can't, I won't get it

all done". Then, as if hands were removed from me I heard, "O.K.".

I looked up quickly, to see my vehicle headed straight toward the

guide rails. I slammed on the brakes, turned the wheel sharply &

lost control while my anti-lock brakes locked. My SUV went on it's

side as I instinctively put my arm out to suspend my 7 month pregnant

belly, to protect the baby. As I did this the window that supported us

broke and my arm was scraped across the road. Thankfully the person

who stopped first, knew what to do. I was taken to the hospital. Paul

arrived later panicked. It takes at least 45 min. to simply get out of the

mines, then 30 min. to get to the hospital. I didn't go to any services,

the bank or stores. I did however, have a lesson outside of church.

God taught me to pay attention, as He clued me into what to do next

through our daughter's life. Without His leading & guiding, I have no

idea where she would be today, if at all. Now, when discouraging

circumstances happen surrounding her, I rest more easily in the fact

that God has a purpose for her here & now.

This Boy...and His heart

I have a boy who has the most beautiful blueish grey eyes you have ever seen.  He is quiet and reserved when you first meet him, then goofy and all over the place when he feels comfortable. He has always had a thing for texture.  When he was just shy of two years old he realized his love for Gap tags.  Everyday after getting dressed he would reach his chubby little arm to the back of his neck and feel for what kind of tag was hanging there.  He loved those canvas, soft tags.  Later, when he was old enough to help choosing his clothing for the day, he would go down the line of hangers feeling all the tags of his shirts.  You can imagine our disappointment when many stores began selling the "tag-less" clothing.  I often giggle when I unpack the small clothing for our now two year old, and my older boy asks "Mom, who does he have so many Gap shirts?"  I show him the tags and he looks at me sideways as if I have made his fascination up....all while rubbing that tag between his thumb and finger.

My boy is aware that with eight children in the home, we do not splurge on many things.  But my boy has his eye on a Sherpa lined hoodie and a pair of high top shoes.  He has longed for these for six months.  I have checked sales and scoured clearance racks.  Then the question came.  "Mom, do you think I could get high top shoes for my birthday?"  This is a big deal in our house.  We do not buy toys and treats year round, so he is asking to forfeit his chance at toys for the shoes.

It's his heart.  His heart that makes us want to get him those shoes.  His heart that makes me want to grant every wish his little heart has.

This is one of those moments when I wonder....is this how God feels about us, and our hearts?

Does he see our hearts, and not just the request?
When our hearts are willing to sacrifice, willing to bend to Him....
Is it then that He wants to give us our hearts desires?

This boy is turning eleven this week.
I found those shoes for my boy...and that Sherpa lined hoodie, 75% off!

God is good, and always showing me things through these children He has given me.

Fighting.

The hardest battles you can't see or hear.

I get out of bed.

I wash my face and brush my teeth.

I read the Bible.

I pray.

Standing dressed, I face the day.

Standing with head high and heart open, I brace myself.

With hope in my soul, I walk into the room.

I go about the routine of the day.

In God's grace I stand.

In His throne room I ask for help from His mighty hand.

We are not alone.

The seemingly simplest tasks are the hardest of them all.