No End In Sight

As Christians we have been called to love others. Sounds pretty simple, right? It is....as long as you love from a distance and equate politeness with love. But what about when God starts stirring your heart towards folks who are more difficult to love? What about when you feel like He wants you to offer more than a smile and an encouraging word? What about when you start looking past behaviors and really start seeing hurting hearts? What about when you stop passing judgement and get into the nitty gritty of someone's life? 
   But when you start putting those thoughts into action, it can get messy. You can get hurt. You will definitely be taken advantage of at some point. You will feel frustrated. Your faith will be challenged. You will have those moments where you wonder what in the world you were thinking to get involved in the first place. You may even retreat for a time to regroup and question if this is really what you are supposed to be doing.
  How do I know??  Because I have been there. I am there. And yet, I still feel called. Even if my heart is broken. Even if they don't bless me. Even when they don't love me back. Even when I think I have nothing else to offer. Even though I may never see the end result.

Galations 6:9 "Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. " NAS

Change is good. Change is good. Change is good.

When I was younger, we had moved twice, but when we returned to my mother's  hometown I thought we'd be there forever.  We did stay for nine years, which is forever in a child's life, but not quite long enough. I had ambitions about cheer captain and Student Council President when we suddenly moved to a suburb of Washington DC. It felt like the end of my life. We were away from my grandparents, in a new culture, and no one cared to know the Assistant Principal's kid, but that's where I found my husband. He is worth it. Change is good.

Recently that wonderful husband came home to tell me it was time to get serious about finding a new job. We had finally settled into a great groove with friends, homeschool, church, and all the connections that make life happy. Kurt's news was unwelcome. The pin in the map kept changing as he applied for this and that job. We could have landed anywhere, but he found a great job a short distance from Ann Arbor. Ann Arbor is a dream location, a possible destination for retirement. The possibility of graduate study is something we both hope for, that made it worth packing our bags right there. Change is good.

Recently, three members of The Shepherd's fish have found that posting is getting in the way of more primary callings. They love the blog, but have to get priorities in order. I have been so blessed to reconnect with Ruth Kennedy, Heather Bowman, and Nicole HIll through this blog. I always knew they were sources of great wisdom, but getting to hear it every eight days was to be nurtured and to grow in so many ways. I hope you have found them equally enlightening. They may drop by to substitute for current writers or for a special project, but for now family and health have compelled them to step aside. If your life has been particularly touched by one of these ladies, take a moment to write a  comment on the post you love best from that author. We are in the process of finding other women with wisdom. I hope you will find change is good.

Solve Troubles, and Deal With Me!

    Lately, my life has gone from a problem, to, then it's fixed, weird! A riding mower lands on my butt and now I sit awkwardly as it heals. However, my driving of said tractor has improved. Sarah's Birthday party, had issues with people not coming, then they could come, but wait, then others are sick so they can't come, but, we can see them later and have their undivided attention, cool! Our car didn't seem to have enough room for everything we wanted to take on our trip. Then as we packed the car, we found out we had plenty of room. Probably why the Mafia uses Cadillac's, one could fit several bodies in the trunk, or in our case, lots of stuff. Then, this same car's oil couldn't be changed because the place that changed it the last time stripped the plug, but wait, it's the same place that is trying to change it this time, and they have insurance. The garage has the part and can change it the day before our trip. The job is done and were on our way, yay! So, after getting half way to our first stop over for the night, this same car just quits. I mean knocks out entirely. Then it starts back, up. Then dies two more times but we get to our first destination. We start out to go to our last destination. I quits again. So we go back to our family we stayed with. It stops short and won't start. The cavalry arrives to pick Sarah & I up while Paul waits for a tow truck. We go to a car rental place. They have nothing available. That place calls another place. They only have one vehicle, but it needs an oil change first....really? Right then, my sister calls and says, "take our van". So we ride with even more room and now don't have to rent a truck to get tables when we get there. Wow! Who but God could do all that?
    So have I been a drama queen and freaked out over any of this? Yep, totally! Until the car stuff, why? Probably because I have a combination of battle fatigue, and why freak out because it doesn't help any way, thing going on now. My personality is generally to freak out now, then deal with the fact that I look like a total idiot, because of overreaction later, type. However, God is shifting things. He is turning on the light bulb. As if on a dimmer switch that He is slowly making brighter.
    Will I ever be the type to calmly deal with things that are a pain in the butt, sometimes literally, taking problems in stride? I would like to think so, and those around me really hope so. However, moving toward that is at least stepping in the right direction. I am understanding that everything happens for a reason, and God really does have a clue as to how to solve troubles. Thankfully, He also knows how to deal with me. Imagine that!

Learning to Sit

Working around behavior problems is one of the great things about homeschooling. My youngest doesn't do sit still and work. He does wiggle and work, walk around and work, and climb and work, especially if the work is highly interactive and fun. Teaching him is a challenge, but the biggest challenge is to get him to allow someone else to teach him. This is most evident at church.

Every week we put on quite the show. On good weeks he gets moved around a lot, on bad weeks, he has taken off clothes and crawled under pews. In our debriefing after church, he always wants to do better, but that seldom turns into action. Even when he's had clear moments of repentance, he can't seem to make the necessary changes.

I can sympathize. There's a couple courses of obedience before me, and I'm ducking them rather than learn to sit. These new disciplines seem unpleasant, difficult, even frightening. I'm quite pleased to pull off the little spiritual development I have. I don't need more. Until I do. The new strength will be absolutely necessary as I enter this new time in my life and its incumbent weakness. I have to learn how to sit.

I Declare.....

   A couple of years ago, my family took a long weekend trip to explore Williamsburg, VA. My husband and I both love anything having to do with our nation's history, especially the history of our founding and movement toward independence.
   We spent time in Jamestown, Yorktown, and Colonial Williamsburg. I loved exploring those old buildings and imagining what life would have been like during the 1700's. I quickly decided that I probably would not have made a very good colonist. I like my air conditioning and mini van too much.
   One of the buildings we went into was the original court house. The curator told us of the history of the building and the proceedings that took place there. As she started talking about the events leading up to the Revolution, my ears perked up. I got cold chills as she walked us toward the front steps of the courthouse and told us that on July 25, 1776 a copy of the Declaration of Independence arrived in Williamsburg. The town folks were gathered just outside the courthouse and the document was formally proclaimed over the city finally declaring that we were a free nation.
   If you ever have the opportunity to visit Williamsburg....make sure you stop at the courthouse and stand on those steps. Take a deep breath and see if you can smell the gunpowder from the muskets that were fired in celebration, and ......if you listen closely you just may be able to hear the shouts of freedom that came from the lips of our ancestors. I promise that your heart will swell with pride as you imagine being there at that moment to hear the day of our freedom declared.

 

Artsy Summer Thoughts.

Galloping play time.
Rollicking laughter.
Splashing pool and spurting lawn sprinkler.
Simple crafts on rainy days.
Look! A Turtle!
Mommy do you see my inch worm?
I'll name all of them "Inchy."
Sunshine that is warm on my face.
Grass that smells like children.
Familiar creak and groan of the swing set.
Jeans fallen apart now cut offs.
Grubby hands reaching for "popsticles."
Deer with fawn and hopping bunnies.
Red hunks of perfect meat sizzling over charcoal fire.
Fireworks.
Gratitude for so many rich blessings.
Tears for fallen. Tears for those in chains.
Wishes. Prayers. Dreams. 
Whispers of a God that loves us

Change

I strongly dislike change.  I quite often have only made changes in my life when forced to.  Most of the instances that I can think of have resulted in a positive outcome, but it never seemed to make it easier to make the change.  

Once again I find myself in a season of change.  I had a strong sense before Philip and I married that we would one day end up back in our hometown.  We had no idea of the timeline, but now it seems that it will be sooner than later.  We have noticed over the last few months that our vehicles are traveling homeward much more frequently than ever, and we have begun to sense the Lord saying, "It's time."  As a matter of fact, a friend recently called Philip and told him that he had been praying for us and he said that the Lord had simply told him, "It's time."  How's that for confirmation? 

Now, I have no idea where exactly this will all lead, but I do know that many things in our life are about to change.  A new job. Another move.  A new house.  New opportunities to see the goodness of God in the land of the living.  I think I'm actually excited about the coming change...

Waiting!

    I am at work finished with my job but still waiting for the internet tech person to show up at the office. It's my daughter's birthday and I want to go home. The only bright spot, is that I have time to work on this blog, ahead of time. I just want to smack the company for making me wait though!
    We have been trying to get this put in for over a month. It's the, oh I think sixth time, they have made an appointment to come put in a second router. I'm like really? Today you choose to do this! I want to spend some time with Sarah, I am buying her a special dessert and pizza for dinner on the way home, since we already had a party. My mom is in for a visit, which is a special treat, but I haven't had much time with her. On top of all that, I must mow the lawn today. After the tractor landing on my butt thing, it takes longer because I am cautious. I like life and am still in pain thanks.
    Oh Lord, please help me to be pleasant to the tech person and not unkind or impatient. It's not his fault the company scheduled us later in the day.
    They that wait upon the Lord, He shall renew their strength. They shall mount up on wings like Eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint....... Just wish this verse also said, they shall not be frustrated and annoyed with others that make them wait and God will give them back the time they lost while doing so. I looked, that's not in there any place. An hour later, STILL WAITING!
    I called, no one is coming today, again. Um, I'm very mad right now. There has to be some reason this would be happening though. I will forgive this person for not showing up but just give me a few minutes to get over it. They can wait, for forgiveness........Never mind, I'm not waiting to forgive, because it doesn't help them, it helps me. I forgive, I'm done waiting, I'm going home.