Bricks.

     A Fable Inspired by a Sermon from My Pastor.

     The Master wanted to build.  He loves making things.  He needed bricks for this job, but His bricks are profoundly different than the standard red rectangles.  He did make a large amount of those, but there were bricks of every size, shape, and color.  The Master made them as He wanted them, called them all to Him, and then, inexplicably, left for a bit.  His only instruction was, "Love each other.  I will be back."
    At first, the bricks sat in their pile and waited with excitement.  But then, something happened wrong.  The red rectangles started screaming that they knew best, and after all, they were the "standard, most popular" bricks.  They left and sat in a wheelbarrow by themselves.  After a while the purple ovals, yellow squares, green circles, and orange stars followed suit.  The workspace was now filled with screaming bricks that were very neatly sorted.  This had to be what the Master intended, right?
     Everything was at least at a cool civil phase until the smug red rectangles noticed that they had somehow ended up with a yellow in their wheelbarrow.  Yellow was a happy brick.  She did not know that she was really that different.  She was a brick after all.  But the reds were not happy.  Yellow was there in their wheelbarrow it was inconceivable.  She had to be converted.  They said, "Cover that!  You are the wrong shape and size!  Fix it quick, we all know red rectangles is what the Master intended!"  Yellow had always been in the red wheelbarrow.  She had known no other life so she left to go fix it.
    First Yellow rolled in red terra cotta clay from the south.  It really didn't work.  As soon as she got wet the red washed off.  Her shame was exposed.  Then Yellow wandered into the workshop and found red paint.  At first, she was thrilled with the result, but after time, the paint flaked off and she was now spotty yellow.  Returning to the workshop Yellow found red stain.  When she finished, she was spotty ghastly orange.  
Yellow started to cry
     The Master, who really hadn't gone all that far, heard her sobs and saw her tears.  "Yellow!"  He said, "What has happened to you!  I need you now there is a space for you and you are red and ghastly orange spotty."  Yellow sniffled.  She told her sad story and the Master cried with her.  He held her and took her to the wall he was building.  She gasped.  
     Yellow saw that there were a rainbow of bricks being used.  Not just in standard rows either.  It was a sight to behold.  There were swirls, loops, Greek keys, and arches.  It was simply the most amazing thing Yellow had ever seen.  Then she saw it.  Yellow saw the spot where she was to fit.  There would be no other color for it.  Yellow was what He needed to complete that part of the pattern.  She cried all the more.  
     The Master smiled, "I can fix it, but it will hurt."  He took her to the work station and poured paint stripper on her and let it sit.  It burned like fire.  He scraped it off and took small chunks of her with the paint.  Then came the sanding.  He sanded away the stained layer but a crack had formed in the center.  Oh she was so broken and sad!  When it all seemed hopeless, the Master picked up a bucket of yellow mud.  "I made you exactly as I wanted you to be.  I have more of the clay here and I will fix it good as new."  With His own hands He filled in the missing chunks and sculpted her back to the way that He intended her to be.  After He blew the clay dry pouring healing into her heart, He said, "I love you and you are beautiful Yellow.  Come and be in my wall."  
     With expert hands He scraped the thick mortar onto her back and fit her into the spot He had always intended her to fill.  She laughed.  She sang.  She fit.  Her life was completed in Him and in His work.  

Anew

Tonight I will embark
I will join a special group of ladies
Looking to encourage each other in our daily lives
To push each other to persue that which God has called us to
To see ourselves as Christ sees us
Lord, we want you to fill this home, and the hearts coming in
Fill us with your thoughts, your heart, your presence
Amaze is with you, Lord
Pour out your grace
Connect us deeply to each other as sitsters in Christ
Use us and our space once again Sweet Jesus

A Joyful Noise

Human beings are such creatures of habit. I didn't assign seats to my college students, and yet they usually sat in the same seats each week. Similarly, many seem to sit in the same pews each week at church. A couple of months ago I sat in a different area of the sanctuary, and as we began singing, I inwardly cringed because the man standing in front of me was loudly singing off-key. Although I don't have perfect pitch like my youngest sister does, it's physically painful for me to hear an instrument played out of tune. The Holy Spirit immediately reminded me that when we are singing in church, what matters is our heart attitude. A soloist could do a magnificent job, but if her motivations and attitudes are not Christ honoring, it's rather meaningless. It's so easy to just go through the motions and sing the words without thinking about what we are saying. One indication that this is happening is when our facial expressions contradict the words we are singing. Whatever we do we are to do to the best of our ability. I am not saying we shouldn't try do do our best, but lack of musical ability shouldn't stop us from praising the Lord. If we don't make a joyful noise, He will cause the rocks to cry out!

Encourage Me!

In reading one of Ann Voskamp's journal pieces, I recently discovered a website called "(in)courage" dedicated to encouraging women in their daily lives, and they are hosting their third annual conference, "(in) Real Life", on the last weekend of April, 2014.  The topic for the past two years has focused on living in community, and building relationships with other women.  This year, the theme is "We Need YOUR Story." When I read about the conference and what God has been doing in the lives of women all over the world, I decided to register this year, and to host a meet-up in my area.  I would like to invite any ladies reading this blog to check it out and consider registering as well.  This conference is different in that YOU DO NOT HAVE TO TRAVEL TO ATTEND THIS CONFERENCE; it comes to you!  Registration is free!  Here is how it works:  First, you register for the conference and sign up to attend a Meet-Up in your area.  On Friday, you watch the online content in the privacy of your own home, then on Saturday you attend a "Meet-Up" in your area, where you connect with other women to view the online content for that day, fellowship, make connections and possibly new friends, and build in community with others of like precious faith.  If there is no local Meet-Up, you could decide to host one yourself, as I am doing.  You can get more detailed information at www.incourage.me.  


When I found this site and the conference, it excited me for several reasons.  First, I have felt a strong desire to be an encourager of other women as God brings me across their paths.  Second, the Lord has been speaking to a group of us regarding The Story (God's Story), of which our individual and collective stories are an integral part.  Third, in the last year, God has placed me in community with 7 amazing women from The Shepherd's fish who inspire and encourage me, pray with me, laugh and/or cry with me, and are building something that is larger and grander than anything we could do as individuals.

So please, take a few minutes and check out (in)courage and the (in) Real Life conference, and consider joining me and sharing your story!

Shove It On God

    I talk to God during my twenty five minute commute to work. One day, as I drove thinking about work, I became overwhelmed. This time, instead of being increasingly bothered, I stopped! I said, "God, here!" "You take all that is entailed with this practice, everything". I balled it all up in my mind and shoved it toward God. Then I said, "I'm tired of praying about it." "I don't know what Your will is!" "You deal with it in what ever way You see fit, I'm out."
    About a week and a half later. My coworker called me at home. She said, the pipes had burst and water flooded the back half of the office. Also, the bosses car had smashed, back end, into a tree as he had started it to warm up, thankfully he was inside his home. I was like, ha?! O.K. God, no clue what You're doing, but this is Your deal. I refuse to take it back.
    Since the office was flooded, my boss had to move up front. This gave him a bird's eye view of the goings on there. His car had been wrecked before but not fully repaired. Since this accident re-injured the same area, the car will now be properly repaired for one lower deductible.
    After all this happened. I told him what I had done, praying and giving God the practice. He said, don't stop praying! I proceeded to tell him what God was doing. "You were suppose to be in the front, so that you would realize Mary is very needed and that job entails more then you had realized. You were honest with the insurance adjuster about the car, so now it is being fixed. God rewarded your honesty." "What I have learned is that when God is in charge fully, everything works out better, even if some things look worse to begin with." My boss totally got it, and so did I, whoohoo!
     Cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you.

House of Broken Dreams

 

   Sixteen years ago my husband and I moved into this house. It was in pretty rough shape. It was advertised as a "labor for rent" exchange, and since we were low on cash and high on enthusiasm, we jumped at the opportunity.
   I still remember hauling out trash left behind by previous tenants, cleaning, scrubbing, sanitizing, and fumigating. We painted, replaced appliances, laid flooring, remodeled bathrooms, and settled in.
   This was going to be where we would start our family. Our bedroom was where the upstairs windows are. Attached to it (window on the upper right) was a small room that would make a perfect nursery. It was in that very bedroom that we got the phone call about a baby girl (not yet born) that was going to be given up for adoption. We were so excited!!! We planned and prepared. We told our family. They bought us a stroller, clothes, and diapers.... As the delivery time drew near, we noticed that communication with the lady who was handling the arrangements dwindled.... and then stopped altogether. I finally called her only to discover that the baby had already been born and the birth mother had changed her mind. We were heartbroken as we began to deal with the devastation of our first failed adoption.
  We could have stopped right there, but instead we started the process of becoming a licensed foster home. We eventually moved out of that house into our current home to accommodate our ever changing family. We have gone through the pain of six failed adoptions so far, but have also been blessed with five permanent additions to our family.
  I took this picture a few days ago. The house has sat empty for years after we moved out, and it is now condemned. I smiled as I looked at those second story windows because the house of our broken dreams had led us to our destiny.

  Jeremiah 29:11(NLT) "For I know the plans I have for you" says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not disaster, to give you a future and a hope...."

Measuring Time

It's time for Senior pictures.  I can still see the nurse dabbing some kind of goo on my firstborn's forehead to make a little bow stick in her baby picture.  She was the most beautiful baby in the whole world.  Now she's an adult--still working it out, but she is beginning to make her own choices. I am so proud of her.  Thankfully, there are five more needing my help and delighting me just as much as Mea has, but the arrow of time only goes one way.  The ride will soon be over.
If family was the only perspective for measuring life, it would be a sad business living it.  There are so many ways to be disappointed, and even when it all goes brilliantly, it ends.  Sure the kids take care of the dying, but for the dying it ends.  Fortunately, we are pursued by a greater lover for whom the arrow of time is meaningless, after all he invented time.  I often get lost in my pursuit of him, certain I'm doing it all wrong (because I am), and I forget that this is a relationship and he is pursuing me.  Then all of the sudden, there he is, up close and personal.  Sometimes he lives a gift, a new insight or image, and sometimes he is simply there holding up his half of the conversation.  I am so thankful for those moments.  They keep me breathing when other joys are gone.  They keep me coming back to the path when I've lost my way.

Spring Cleaning



Spring Cleaning
Sweep away the bitterness
Throw away despair
Let not my heart be cold
Warm with Your Kiss,
The Breath of Life
Seeping into every corner of my heart
Allow no ice in my veins
Chase death away with Life
Replace the gloom with Hope
That I may take In
Your Promises
Cast off the clutter of broken dreams
And Flood my life with Possibility
Give me the relief of a light heart
That I may breathe easier
And set my soul on Fire
Please melt the restless, falling snow
That I, alive in spring, may grow