Take Me Instead

When it comes to my family, sacrifice is simply another opportunity to show love in a tangible way. I want to show my kids the same kind of love God shows me, that "I won't let you fall so far that My love can't reach your hand as it reaches for Me." It's not about short-tem "success." It's not about honor and reputation. It's about the long haul, and it's about their future. I want my kids to look back some day and know I really CARED, and was happy to give them my time. I want them to especially hold onto the Truth, no matter what the world's wagging tongues are saying at any given time, and to become better people for it....and I am far from perfect, and I hurt, and don't have all the answers. I just pray that God helps me to get up off the floor after being knocked down, to stand between my family and the world if need be. When my family comes under fire from something that has become unjust, to threaten to destroy us, may God give me strength and peace to stand in the gap to say, "Enough!" Until my children have the ability to withstand the twisted world on their own, I pray God helps me to prepare them and be a filter for excessive harshness.  Take me instead.  

Snail Mail

These days most of our written communication comes electronically. It's nice to be able to send a message for free and receive a response back very quickly. Many weeks our mail carrier only delivers bills, magazines, and junk mail to our mailbox. Ever since I was a child, I have considered it a treat to receive a card or a letter that came through the mail. As electronic communications have become more and more common over the past twenty years, it seems that snail mail from a friend or loved one has become even more special. Before I began using e-mails, I used to send many letters through the mail, but over the last twenty years I haven't sent many cards or letters aside from my annual Christmas card. Over the past year I have been encouraged on many occasions by a card someone has sent me. Seeing what a blessing it has been in my life, I have set a goal to at the very minimum send one card a month. Maybe to a widow who will soon be approaching the one year anniversary of her husband's homegoing, my daughter's Sunday School teacher, or to someone whose beloved pet recently passed away. Who couldn't use a little encouragement through the mail every now and then? I pray the Holy Spirit will bring just the right person to my mind and use whatever I send to brighten her day. "Encourage one another and build each other up" (1 Thessalonians 5:11). Maybe you could drop a card or a letter in the mail to someone this week?

Dream Holy

I like to dream big--to think about how little can become much.  I especially like to dream big about God's kingdom.  If God can give us so much, why can't we do more with it?  He gave us his Son, his only Son, and what have we done?  Fed the hungry? not really.  Sheltered the homeless? not really.  Upheld the despairing? not so much.  I get frustrated.  I write off big ideas and I look around for good small ideas.  Small ideas are just so slow and I have no patience.

Then I remember St. Zita, my patron saint, the patron saint of domestic servants.  She wasn't a nun.  She wasn't particularly clever.  She wasn't rich or powerful in any way.  She was the maid, then the cook, and after a rocky journey, the housekeeper of a Roman family.  The only thing she was was holy.  Her holy was enough to feed and clothe the poor.  It was enough to transform her employers and everyone who knew her.  St. Zita's holiness looked like scrubbing, baking, and cooking.  Her holiness was as everyday as you can get, but God in the middle of that everyday changed everything. It's still changing everything, including me.

Pray It Forward

   Last Monday was a rough day. (Understatement) ...... Our family has been dealing with some tough stuff for several months now, but for some reason this particular day brought overwhelming anxiety. I battled between my mind, spirit, and body over the difference of what I believe and what was staring me in the face. My body revolted and began giving in to a full blown panic attack. Heart palpitations, dizziness, nausea, trembling, ears ringing, and room spinning sensations made normal functioning impossible. I was beyond anxious. I was terrified! I finally ended up having to take medication to combat the physical symptoms that were overtaking me.
   The next morning I learned of some difficulties that a friend of ours is facing. As the day went on, the panic that had rendered me useless the day before kept trying to rear it's ugly head. I decided that since I couldn't do anything to change my own circumstances, I would purposely pray for my friend. So I did. A few days later, I was talking with my brother in law who told me that he and my sister had been sensing an urgency to pray for me that week. And they did.
  I may not have been able to pray for myself, but I could believe for God to move on behalf of my friend. And while I was doing that, someone else was believing and praying for me.

Seasons

Last night I went to a church service in Pittsburgh and one of the ministers told a story of a man who sent his four sons to view a fruit tree on a faraway piece of property.  He sent each son during a different season; one in the winter, one in the spring, another in the summer and the last in the fall of the year.  He asked each one to describe the tree upon returning.  The first son saw what looked like a tiny, withered, dead tree, and he saw no hope for future life or growth from it.  The second son, upon returning, told the first brother that he was wrong; this tree was growing and beginning to grow leaves.  The third son said that they were both wrong.  The tree he saw was large and strong, with beautiful flowers all over it.  The last son said that they were all wrong.  The tree was heavy with fragrant, ripened fruit, ready for harvesting.  The father told them that they were all right.  They had simply seen the same tree in different seasons.  The minister then compared this story to how we view others and how quickly we form opinions and judgements regarding them, when we are only seeing them in one season of their lives.  

Wow.  That made me consider how easily I get frustrated and am tempted to give up on people who God has placed in my path, when they don't appear to be acting in the manner that I think they should be acting, after I have poured into their lives.  How unbelievably arrogant of me!

Lord, remind me when I begin to feel this way, that I am seeing only one season of their life.  Remind me that one will plant the seeds, another will water them, but it is You who gives the increase!

He Has Me Covered

I was feeling overwhelmed with all the things that have come my way
lately. We were having internet problems at work. Then, after getting
the internet fixed, my computer would not turn on, at all. I didn't get a
day off from work at all this week, and I normally only work 2-3 days.
The door in the Walmart dressing room would not open, after many
tries by several people. I finally said, "give me a screwdriver so I may

take the handle entirely off from inside". I laughed and everyone was
laughing also.

Other times, I freak out on my family. My poor dogs eyes are wide open,
as he shakes in the corner. My daughter is crying, and my husband has
simply left the room, or house entirely. I would not recommend freaking
out on ones family. After doing so, I feel bad, realize my issue, clam
down & apologize. I pet my poor, petrified, eyes peeled backtill whites
are all you see, dog in the corner. Other times, God gives me grace I do
not have on my own, to deal with situations that would otherwise be made
worse, by this behavior.

What ever the case, these times make me very thankful that God is in charge.
That He won't let anything go too far, even my temper. In my weakness His
strength rises. He provides a door of escape, or in my case, the ability to look
at a dressing room door & figure out how to remove it, to then escape, and
the ability to laugh at the whole thing.So Glad my heavenly Father has me
covered either way.

In View of His Mercy

I am often asked "How do you do it all"

In all honesty, I simply don't

I sit here today, completely sleep deprived for the past 7 days

Ear and head feeling it is about to burst, fevered

Schooling Children and speaking of God and His goodness

Teaching of the gospel and all that means to us today

 How?

There are no sick days for mommies

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.

In view of God's mercy

My eyes and heart on Him

Always pursuing

Often failing

Unfamiliar Roads.

    I have a friend that lives in a neighboring town that is connected by a very isolated back road.  It is the kind of road that feels like someone's really extended driveway.  Recently she asked me for a ride to town so I gladly prepared myself for awful potholes and poor cell service.

     In broad day light I found myself prepared for the roads uncomfortable twists and drove at a speedy 45mph.  The light exposed so much of the ruts, washed away bits, and detritus blocking part of the way.  As we drove, I kept my eyes on the road and respected my surroundings.

     We went to our scheduled meeting and were challenged to exceed expectations and use our spiritual gifts.  We had learned much and had a lot to share on our crazy road back to her house.  My friend is extremely wise and kind.  She has a generosity of spirit that puts my cynical side to unspeakable shame.  As I again navigated the twists and turns now in the total darkness that comes in northern Tippecanoe County at night, I listened to her share her thoughts and the plans that she'd made.

     I found myself driving at 30 mph and thinking much.  Her light exposed my ruts, washed away bits, and detritus blocking my progress.  As I delicately picked my way back to her house in my SUV, she delicately picked away at the hardness of my heart.  I am grateful for her thoughts, putting into practice what she taught, and hoping for the brightness of day to show a clearer path.