Wading through the puddles, barely seeing through the mist that builds on my glasses
My boy rings out his mow hawk, my girl drags her heavy wet dress
What was fun at first, seems no longer a joy
I say a prayer for each family that opened their doors....and even one for those who did not
They say it is worth it, but I just am not sure
Sometimes we are hopeful in daily life as well
Knocking on doors, waiting and wondering, will God answer
Where will tht door lead
Sometimes it is fun
Joy-filled and exciting
Sometimes it looses it's appeal
Wading through the puddles, barely seeing through the mist that builds on my glasses
In his book, Heaven, Randy Alcorn argues against the familiar saying that people can be "so heavenly minded that they are of no earthly good." Paul said in Colossians 3:2 "Let heaven fill your thoughts. Do not think only about things down here on earth." Although I believe that heaven is going to be an amazing place that far exceeds my wildest imagination, there are things here on earth that I am hoping to experience before I'm taken up to glory, such as watching my children grow up and becoming a grandmother some day. During times of grief and loss, I find great comfort in the knowledge that in heaven there will be no pain, tears, sickness, or sadness. Struggles here on earth and the knowledge that another piece of my heart has already gone to be in the presence of the Savior increase my longing for that glorious day. We like for things to end on a happy note. It has been hard for me to accept that my childbearing years are ending on the sad note of a miscarriage, but my time here on earth is not the end of the story. My prayer is that my increased focus on heaven will be of great benefit to those around me. It is so easy to get caught up in the mundane aspects of life here on earth and not put enough of our time and resources into what matters for eternity.
This week as we celebrated my father's 73rd birthday, I couldn't help thanking God for blessing me with such a loving earthly father. Looking back on my childhood, it struck me that I grew up never, ever doubting that I was deeply loved by my father. I just walked confidently in the knowledge that he loved and accepted me, that he was proud of me, and that he would protect me, guide me, and give me whatever was in his power to provide. Because of this, my relationship with God as my Father has mostly been walked out in a similar manner. I just know that He loves me, and I live my life with that confidence.
My husband has three grown children, and one of the things that initially attracted me to him was his heart for his children. I have watched his face as he has told me about each of them and how much he loves and misses seeing them frequently, and I know without question that this man loves his children, and would walk through fire for them if necessary.
I think of all the young people, especially the girls who have crossed my path and are in my life now, who have never known this kind of love. Some of them do not even know who their father is, or may have only met him once or twice in their lives. I am watching most of these girls run here and there, desperately seeking love, yet not knowing what love truly is. Without realizing it, they are looking for the love of the father that they never had, and are only finding heartache. My heart weeps for these "little girls lost", and I just love on them and pray for them daily that they would have an encounter with God as their "ABBA" (DADDY) and that their hearts and emotions would be healed so that they can walk in the confidence that they are highly favored and deeply loved, and that the relationships and eventual marriages that they enter into can be healthy, loving relationships that they can in turn model for their children.
There are times when I just know that God wants me to do
something. A month or so ago, I knew I was suppose to go visit
loved ones. A suggestion as to the best time was proposed and agreed
upon. Then my husband was asked to go on a trip with his friends that
same weekend. The wrinkles simply continued to pile up, and became more
so, the closer the time came to depart. The week before things really
fell apart. From having my husbands workers compensation income
suspended, without warning, my job being in jeopardy, no place for Scooby
to stay, strife & confusion in our house in general, no sleep,
stress simply abounded.
I called my loved ones & said, "I'm not going to be able to come". They said, "we really would like for you to come because......", a light went on. Oh, I am suppose to go, and the enemy is freaking out because God will defeat evil through me. At that point, I was determined to go. I was like, oh it's on now, so step back evil, because I'm step-pin up!
I called my loved ones & said, "I'm not going to be able to come". They said, "we really would like for you to come because......", a light went on. Oh, I am suppose to go, and the enemy is freaking out because God will defeat evil through me. At that point, I was determined to go. I was like, oh it's on now, so step back evil, because I'm step-pin up!
One by one, each of the wrinkles were smoothed out. I deal with
insurance companies for a living, so God had shown me how to deal the
the workers comp. issue. I asked
Christians to pray for my job situation. I also prayed with my coworker,
then boom, all was well. Scooby had a loving family to take care of him,
all of a sudden. Sarah, was lead to pray for strife & confusion to go, and it did.
On the way to my destination, I listened to two
messages, through the radio, that were tailor made to my
situation. God worked miraculous wonders and brought understanding and healing to their
world of hurt and dissension.
God could have done all that without me. Thankfully, He chose to use me as a tool to work His will and way. All while teaching me, to trust and obey Him on a level I had not before. Praise God for His infinite mercy.
God could have done all that without me. Thankfully, He chose to use me as a tool to work His will and way. All while teaching me, to trust and obey Him on a level I had not before. Praise God for His infinite mercy.
But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible".
Matthew 19:26
Several years ago, instead of our anniversary being a celebration, it was the night that we would decide whether we would continue life together or remain separated. That night did not go well, and within a few weeks I began the process of filling out the paperwork to file for a divorce.
I never thought I would have found myself in that position, but it seemed as if there was no other way. I cut off all communication with my husband and began to move toward what I thought was going to be the only resolution....BUT GOD had something different in mind.... He began to turn our hearts back toward each other. Ironically enough, even though I had prayed for our marriage to be restored, I struggled with walking it out. I didn't like having to align myself with what God was doing. I would react before there was anything to react to. I kept myself at a distance and even took a job out of town so that I wouldn't be home as much. And all the while, I had those divorce papers tucked away in the back of a filing cabinet "just in case".
One day God spoke to my heart that it was time to let go of my safety net....my "just in case"..... There was no room for "plan B". I went to the filing cabinet, got those papers out, and I ran them through the shredder one by one.
Yesterday was our 22nd wedding anniversary. A huge milestone considering what could have been. A reminder of a commitment that was not only made long ago, but a commitment that is made every day..... to love each other through it all!
Here I am
again
For a Time,
then gone away
If you didn’t
notice me,
That’s
perfectly ok
For now you
see me,
Now you don’t:
I’m only
here a while
If your
memory is sure,
I hope it
has my fleeting smile
But I will
never fit right in
I’m only
passing through
Back and
forth, within the storm-
One moment brought
me right to you
Face to
face, then drawn once more
Into the swirling,
wild chain
You may go
on and blame the dark,
And never
really see me,
Caught up in
the storm, inside the pain,
Like a
Snowflake in the Rain
This is what happens when I'm working on three projects at once. Well, three projects on the desk, three more are buried in drawers. Let's not spend anytime thinking about the state of my house. It doesn't matter. I'm the happiest I've been in a long time. The projects aren't new, and neither is the urge to work on them, the difference seems to be that now I'm finding a better balance. I used to have to choose between completing projects and raising children. I'm proud to say my life has been cluttered with unfinished work, but that was then.
God has been working in my life to both strengthen me, and to improve my sense of priorities. Things I felt were wasted time, are now my life savers giving me the energy to deal with things I like less. The things I like less have become unexpected downtime since they require little thinking for the most part. Everything isn't perfect--look at that desktop--but it is certainly better than it's been. Listening to God even when he sounds a little crazy is my new way of being, on my good days, like today.
This summer my husband and I agreed that Comcast does not have my family's interests at heart at all. They don't care about my children or my marriage, so, out the door they go. ..... no more Bravo, Project Runway, Longmire, PARENTHOOD!!, and DIY. ........ I was surprisingly bereft.
I thought, "It is just TV, why the pain?" Well, I'm not going to go through every show, but one that I missed the most was "Real Housewives of New Jersey." Judge me all you want, I loved the show. Unlike other "Housewives" shows, the New Jersey mamas all seem really fascinating. They, sadly enough, were people like the ones I knew. My parents briefly lived in New Jersey and were shocked to find that many, not all, Jersey folk, REALLY ACT THAT WAY.
I started to care whether siblings Joe and Theresa could ever work it out again. I prayed for them. I still do when I think of it. I had the illusion of being a part of something I knew nothing about. I don't know if it was fake or if they all love each other in real life. I know nothing about them. But I CARED. I debated if Melissa was manipulative or sincere. Can't tell from watching the show.
I was describing my angst to my friend who had also given up TV for the sake of family budget and sanity. She looked at me and said, "Karen, you just have to stop caring about the shows. You don't know the outcomes of your favorite evening soaps or who won the reality contest. IT'S OK."
So, goodbye Theresa. If you are in as much hot water as the tabloids say you are and if your family is in that much angst, I pray for you. I pray for the best, but this is the end. I don't NEED to know what happens anymore.
I just read a wonderful article on the Christian's perspective of Halloween. This is a topic I have struggled with for years. The article talked about how this is an opportunity to love on your neighborhood. This is the stance we have taken for years. I have, however noticed another issue with this supposed child friendly holiday. When looking for a costume idea on the racks of my local store I was saddened. If we choose to purchase a costume pre-made, we have several options. All of the action figures for boys, and some cute fall characters such as scarecrows and pumpkins. They have great options for boys, but it is the costumes for the girls that is troublesome. Wether you would like to be a fairy, a princess, or even a doctor for goodness sake, they have somehow managed to overly sexualize each one of these costume options. As my daughter Trinity says "she has naughty eyes mama". How did we get to this point? How is it that while we are trying to teach our daughters to dress with dignity and grace, we can enjoy being the prostitute version of our favorite childhood toy on this one fun night of the year? Why do we feel that Tink is in need of "naughty eyes" while she is out hunting for candy in the crisp night air? I believe we have made a mockery of men and women alike by encouraging others to dress as fools, so we can have a good laugh at their expense. Is there a heart issue here that is in need of a change?
Lord, as we seek to be your hands and feet, let our actions and choices be intentional. Help our hearts to be aligned with you, and help us to be great examples of your church as we spread your light in our communities this season.
My favorite Dr. Seuss character is Horton, who is known for saying, "I meant what I said and I said what I meant, an elephant's faithful, one hundred per cent!" The Horton quote that has frequently come to my mind over the past couple of weeks is "a person's a person, no matter how small" in reference to my recent miscarriage. When I had my first miscarriage in 2005, I quickly learned that although people mean well, they can easily say the wrong thing. People were trying to offer comfort through spoken and written words to me, but sometimes inwardly my response was "ouch!" to what they said. Several referred to it as a "disappointment." An ectopic pregnancy involves the loss of a child. It's not just a disappointment. I remember thinking that if they were attending a funeral, they wouldn't refer to someone's death as a "disappointment." Some said "at least you know you can get pregnant" because it was our first pregnancy after trying for three years. I had made a similar statement to a friend of mine after she miscarried; after my miscarriage I apologized to her, as I had learned the hard way that this is not at all a comforting statement to make to a woman who has recently miscarried. There is no guarantee that the woman will be pregnant again in the future, and it makes light of the loss of that particular child.
I thought that this miscarriage would be much easier to handle than the two I had before I gave birth to my three children. It has been a little easier because my arms are no longer empty, but it's been a lot harder than I thought it would be. I mentioned this to someone, and she said that she knew a woman who had eleven children. She had a miscarriage after her tenth child, and many made comments implying that she shouldn't be grieving the loss since she already had ten children at home. She responded that she loved each child right from the start. A friend of mine whom I met on an online discussion board ten years ago has had two children through ivf. Although she has never experienced a miscarriage, she has been extremely compassionate to me through my loss. Last week she surprised me with a delivery of six chocolate covered strawberries as her way of recognizing my loss. It meant so much to me to sense that a friend was truly "weeping with those who weep." In the past I have sent cards and emails to friends who have gone through a miscarriage, but I've never gone beyond that. A man from my handbell choir had flowers delivered to my house after my second miscarriage in 2007. The next time I find out that a friend has had a miscarriage, I am going to show my sympathy in a more tangible way. It's customary in our culture to do something when there is a funeral involved, but it's not the norm after a miscarriage. "A person's a person, no matter how small." One blessing that can come out of suffering is that it can help me be better equipped to minister to others.
For most of my life and up until I married Philip almost two years ago, I was the sole breadwinner in my household, and that burden weighed heavily on my shoulders. As a result of that I have unfortunately developed the habit of worrying about finances and what would happen if something changed with my income. I know that I shouldn't worry, and that God is my provider; at least I say that I know that. I have seen Him provide for me in the past, when things looked very desperate. I have seen Him provide for friends and family members in truly miraculous ways, yet I still catch myself fretting about it in the back of my mind at times.
About two weeks ago, a coworker and I were informed that a computer had determined that our "standard hours" would be cut from 40 to 39 per week for each of us. We could work 40 hours if the work was available, which it usually is (except for the occasional low census), but when we took vacation or sick time, we would only be paid for 39 hours instead of 40. Now I know that this doesn't sound like much, but losing an hour's pay in a week could cause a problem, and if it happened often, it could be disastrous. Naturally, we grumbled about it amongst ourselves, but each of us was glad that they didn't just choose to dock one of us to 38 hours instead, and we were also acutely aware that we fared better than another coworker who had had his standard hours cut from 40 to 32 (same deal for him; he can and does work 40, but is only paid for 32 if he takes a week off or has sick time during the week). Despite my best efforts, I found myself quietly worrying about how this would affect us when hours started to be lost.
Last week my boss had to attend a meeting with her directors, and when she returned she told my coworker and me that our standard hours were not going to drop after all due to some other changes that were happening with another employee (good changes for her as well). Sometimes I wonder if God doesn't look at us and shake His head when we grumble and fret and carry our worries around instead of leaving them with Him. All I know is that He is so good to me!
Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.
Psalm 56:3
Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!
Psalm 34:8
YOU'RE NOT MY $@&#%#@ FATHER!"....... I couldn't see the look on my husband's face when one of our children blurted out those hurtful words, but I felt myself catch my breath. I thought my heart stopped. I had just witnessed a wounded heart projecting it's own pain onto the heart of the man who wants to be a father to this child...... not because he is obligated, but because he truly loves and cares about this child.
How many times do we humans reject our Heavenly Father because of our own hurts? We keep ourselves distanced from the very one who wants to Father us.....not because He is obligated, but because He truly loves and cares about us.
In the days following the outburst, I have to be honest.... I struggled with even being polite to my child. I felt angry at how my husband had been treated. After all, he owed this child nothing....yet over and over he willingly picks up the load of responsibility that has been abandoned by the biological dad.
I looked at him one day and said "I don't know how you continue after what was said to you". As I observed my husband over the next few days, I watched him walk out a statement that he made long before this incident. He said "When I signed my name on those court papers to adopt each one of our 5 children...I meant it! I am their father....no matter what!"
How much greater is God's love toward us......no matter what!
Sometimes God allows others to
offend or harm us, so that we may forgive them. Through this, we are
given a very powerful weapon against evil. Your probably saying, what?
If evil's intention is to harm you, and cause you to hate, how will
evil inflict the most harm? It will use those closest to you, to do
the very most damage possible and enslave you. When you choose not to, be offended, angry, hateful or bitter, evil is then defeated. It's purpose is cut
down.
If you turn your other cheek and
say to evil, here slap this one too, and
you keep the door shut to anger, bitterness and resentment, you are
wielding a powerful weapon against evil called love. You are in control
of yourself and evil does not control you. It then cannot enslave
you.
It helps to remember that we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12
Evil
will use any willing vessel, even one that is unaware of it's
willingness, or that it's being used. The person doing the harm isn't
the problem, evil is the problem.
Sometimes we have to ask God to show us the enemy in front of us, instead
of the person standing there. Kind of like seeing the audience in their underwear, it puts us at ease & gives us perspective.
Whether the person ever asks for forgiveness or not. Whether they are sorry, don't even know what they have done, or are even mean and continue in the harmful behavior still. We must forgive them. Not for their sake, but for our own. The Lord's Prayer says; "forgive us our wrong doings as we forgive others." In others words, I am giving forgiveness and ask for forgiveness of God, for myself. The bible says, give and it will be given to you. Action = Reaction. So unless you have never done anything to harm others, you must first give forgiveness, then ask for forgiveness.
At times I had to go to God and say. I don't want to forgive this person, Ever God! I can't forgive them God! Will you give me the desire to forgive them? The ability to forgive them, oh just do it for me please, cause I got nothin here God. Here take it!! Then, He deals with me and the problem. Sometimes it's right then and sometimes it takes a while. Feelings change and healing begins.
Lord
God, may we not allow ourselves to be a vessel for the enemy to be used for
harm. May we also, resist the devil that He will flee from us. Please forgive others through us, when we can't, we ask this in Jesus name, amen.
The first time I read that quote I was rather taken aback and had to throw it in the pot with everything else on the back burner of my mind. As it has stewed, I've come to understand that when you are focused on Satan you are focused on avoiding suffering. Suffering is a natural part of life, ask any mother, and it cannot be avoided. You are trapped in fear. No one shrugs fear off easily and very few can overcome it entirely, but I have found I do much better when I am focused on Christ and his work in the world.
With my eyes on Christ I remember that suffering is redemptive, sometimes in ways I cannot see, but I can always trust. His cross illuminates my path and gives it meaning. He lifts me above my experience and into his presence. In the life of saint after saint, there is a time of fear and then the breakthrough when they are not only changed, but they change the world around them.
That's what I think Satan is afraid of.
Beyond all Hope
There Is You
Past the Finely-Shattered
Windows of my Dreams
There Is You
One Instant
After my Final Breath
There Is You
A Step beyond Tomorrow
A Breath beyond Today
Before the first Yesterday,
Beyond my Wildest Dreams
There Is You
Ok, we're all gross, super sick. I'm so gloriously ill that my husband is taking a day of to help. Don't know where I'd be if he didn't. Oh, it's just a virus, it'll pass, but I feel so helpless. So I leave you with this thought from Henry Ford. "Whether you think you can or you can not, you're right."
The power of our minds influence greatly the outcome of our efforts. I could never do that attitudes kill our projects before they are even off of the ground.
Today in whatever you are facing make an effort to see possibilities instead of walls.
Lord, we need you.
We need to to fully reside in our hearts and minds. To capture the hearts of our children. You can have my weakness today Lord. Mold me, place me into that fire, and refine my heart again. At your feet, I lay my burdens. I lay down the thoughts of man, my weary old body, and my heart breaks. I am overwhelmed by your goodness, and praise your holy name.
Lord, we need you.
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My uncle shared with us recently that he had been reading in Exodus where Moses asked God to show him His glory, and God told Moses that he could not see His face and live, but that He would cause all His goodness to pass before him. My uncle then began to ask God daily to show him His goodness. Every day, not long after he prays this prayer, my uncle encounters someone who desperately needs to know how much God loves him or her. In ministering the love of the Father to others, my uncle is finding himself refreshed, revived and increasing in his passion for making a heart connection with those who may never set foot in a traditional church. Ask God to show His goodness to you, and see who He brings across your path!
My husband told our daughter that he was taking her to get school clothes. She threw a fit. He said "you would have thought I was taking off her arm." I sat down on Sarah's bed with her and asked. "What is it about shopping that you don't like?" "Do you not like to go into the store"? "Sarah said, no". "Do you not like to look at the clothes?" "Sarah said, no". Do you not like my going with you, because it takes longer and my style is different?" "Sarah said, especially that mom." I said, "well you need warmer clothes that fit, so would you be O.K. with looking online and ordering?" Her eyes lit up, this new idea intrigued her. She agreed.
We looked online and she showed me what she liked. Paul and I went to one of our favorite stores and purchased items that matched her taste. However, her size was different then what I had thought. She loved the colors and styles. After she tried them on, she came down and gave me a big hug. That doesn't happen as often these days. So I told her, "look, you need to go with me to exchange the clothes that don't fit because you must try the clothes on. I promise I will not take long." She fussed, then I said, "I'll take you to your favorite restaurant," she agreed.
I was true to my word and we were in and out like a flash. She even agreed to get shoes in another store. That is the shortest time I have ever spent purchasing shoes in my life. This entire situation makes me think of how I am with God, more often then not. He wants to give me something but I fuss and whine and finally give in. In the end, I am thrilled with what He has for me, be it patients, maturity or even material possessions. So why do I fuss with Him and make the blessing take longer for the end result? Why can't I simply trust that God has my best interest in mind and know that He works all things together for good, to them that love Him and are called according to His purpose? Well, the item doesn't come to me in the manor I am familiar with. It's out of my comfort zone. Just like Sarah going to the store. As our spiritual life matures and expands, we need new attitudes, new ways of being more like Christ. Our old spiritual clothes don't fit, or are not for the climate we are dealing with, in that season. It's only when we trust God, that things go smoothly and our being becomes more like His. We are then thrilled with the results in a much sooner time frame.
Oh Father, I submit myself to You. Please remind me when I fuss, that you have my best interest in mind and please lovingly take me into your perfect will, amen.
Payday. That moment when all of our hours of hard work shows up in our bank accounts. Some paydays are better than others. Some leave you with enough for the extras while some just barely cover the bills.
Today is my payday. No room for the extras this time. But I keep reminding myself of things that have been happening over the past several months....
There have been days when I would look in my pantry and then in my bank account only to find that one was just as empty as the other. I was at the end of my natural resources. There was nothing more I could do except pray. Time and time again we have stood shaking our heads in amazement at the provision of our Heavenly Father.
We have had money handed to us, 100lbs of potatoes show up in our carport, people have dropped off meals, home canned goods, and fresh produce. I stopped to buy a bag of apples and was handed a free bag of groceries at the checkout. A former foster child gave us her unused WIC vouchers for milk, eggs, and cheese along with a surplus of her food benefits.
We have seen decreases in utility bills, found Kohl's cash that covered new jeans, had Staples reward points mailed to us that covered an office expense, and even had debt cancelled.
Some people might look at these happenings as coincidence, but I see them for what they truly are.... Miracles!
Matthew 6:8 ...."your Father knows what you need even before you ask."
Usually I have one idea that I've been chewing on for a week or two, and I spit it out here. Recently my life has come into a new balance of faith, family, friends and work that means I have access to a constant stream of new ideas. It's hard to choose. What a wonderful problem. I can't bear to speak too much about it, or a change I don't want will find me. That's what I fear.
The verse that seems sent to inform my reason is "'For I know the plans I have for you,'" declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'. Jeremiah 9:11." Even when right now is the happiest I've been since I was fourteen? Even now, I hope and believe.
My daughter
is on a good volleyball team. She practiced all summer to make it, and is
working hard all season to improve her playing skills. The team has won quite a few games. They played well, but lost two of three games
in the set last night against one school. (Hey, you can’t win ‘em all.) She
came home discouraged, not because of the loss but because her coach had told
the team that he was ashamed to send some of them out onto the court. She said that they had played well, even better than usual, but she
was worried that the coach would overwork them at today’s practice because he
was upset with them. Ok….she also
thought maybe he was just having a bad day.
I certainly hope so! Otherwise,
the coach shouldn’t be surprised if this discouragement for the team leads to future
failures. For the most part,
fortunately, she has had a positive experience emphasizing the team’s support
of one another, which is a big reason her team has done well in the past. She will be alright, and hopefully her coach will be back to normal today. Aren’t you glad that God doesn’t do that to
us? He is the One Who definitely has the
right to lay us low for every failure:
after all, He is truly Perfect, and our failures are many. But He doesn’t: you won’t hear “I’m ashamed that you belong
to Me. I don’t even want to send you out
there!” He is ashamed of us only if we are ashamed of Him. Luke 9:26 says “For whosoever shall be ashamed of me and of my words,
of him shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he shall come in his own glory,
and [in his] Father's, and of the holy angels.” He forgives us for every
failure, scrapes us off the sidewalk, and sets us back on our feet. He wants us to hold our heads high, so that
we can look at Him and see the love in His eyes. We cannot surprise God. He can handle
anything we can mess up. Our worth is
not based on OUR accomplishments, but on HIM, and He is Worthy Who MAKES us
worthy. "And we know that all things work together for good to those who
love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He
foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He
might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He predestined, these
He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified,
these He also glorified. What then shall we say to these things? If God is for
us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:28-31. God’s Self-Worth is not based on our
performance: ours is based on His, and He has already won the whole game! John
16:33 says “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye
might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer;
I have overcome the world.” He is the Winner of all time! I am so
glad that He accepted me onto His team, into His family, forever. He will never cast me out.
I have many really intelligent friends. They all tell me that if God wanted to make himself known personally to them, He would have by now. Sure, I see that, I can almost understand it if it weren't for the fact He has done that many many times. Let's take a look.
In Genesis, two people could not have had closer contact with God. If they had moments of doubt, all they had to do was call out His name. They ignored him and did their own thing anyway.
In Exodus, as God thundered on the Mountain while talking to His chosen man Moses, if anyone doubted, all they had to do was touch the mountain and die. I'm sure many of them did despite the fact that they had been told not to. They could hear the Great I Am talking in loud tones to Moses. They managed to ignore it all and build a bull to worship with Aaron instead. Face palm.
King Solomon built God a temple that was legendary. It was a wonder of the world! When it was done to the letter, God filled the temple with His glory so thick the priests could not move. One son later, Israel was split into two pieces and riddled with an idol to Molech problem.
Jesus came with outstanding miracles that rose up the dead, calmed the storms, and fed the herds of people. Blind men saw, leprous men were cleansed! We killed Him. He raised Himself up and we still don't see it.
Do you catch my jive? Do you buy what I'm selling? It works differently now. Things have changed. God will work behind the scenes in a hidden way in your life until you take that first step of faith. When you open your heart to truly believe, then the peace, miracles, spiritual healings, and grace are rained down with abundance. God now waits to show up until you move.
You must take that first faltering step, and when you do, you'll find you were pushed by an unseen hand into a Kingdom that is very real and filled with wonder and grace.
I am plagued by a spirit of perfectionism. Whenever we have guest in our home I resolve to be relaxed, casual and spirit filled. To welcome guests into our home with a warm smile and a hot cup of java, and cookies, fresh baked cookies! I envision having uplifting conversations with first-time guests, and deep meaningful talks with life-long friends. To use our home as a blessing to others.
I do just fine cleaning up the house and preparing the food, but then something happens right at the last minute. It is as if I walk through my home with eyes of a foreigner. A terribly opinionated, judgmental and harsh foreigner. I see all the messy corners, and all the fingerprints on the walls. And the piles, oh the piles that I just cannot seem to keep from forming in our lives. Piles of things to give away, piles of things to sort, piles of importance. Ugh. I become a hectic hot mess within. You may not always see it, but my heart is scurried, and overwhelmed. This is a behavior I must stop. I remember this behavior from so many ladies that came before me, and I do not want this to be a legacy.
Then we were invited to our dear friends home. They just had a beautiful new baby, and finished up a huge remodel on their home. We were welcomed with warm hugs and the conversations were sweet and rich. We were blessed. And there were piles. Piles of things to be sorted and put back into the new home, piles of laundry worn by five beautifully loved children, piles of toys and art supplies and books. Those piles were beautiful. They represented to me so much grace as God spoke to my heart that night. Not once did I think of my dear friend in any negative way, not like the way I speak to myself before opening our home.
Lord, I need your thoughts and your priorities to reign in me today, and everyday as we open our home to your people.
As I was preparing to teach this lesson, I paused to recollect a few of the times God has helped me face a giant. The first that came to my mind was last summer when He provided a way for my newborn son to be transported by ambulance. I had spent most of that summer in a hospital almost two hours from our house because it was the closest hospital that performed fetal blood transfusions, which my son needed to have done more than once. We were told when he was born that he would likely be in the NICU for 6-8 weeks. Since I had already spent so many weeks so far away from my husband and other two children, I desperately wanted to have him transported to a NICU much closer to our home. The NICU staff told me that the insurance would not pay for his transport and that it would cost somewhere between $750-$2,250. We were already facing the possibility of owing thousands of dollars for medical bills from the pregnancy, so we did not feel we could afford this expense.
I mentioned this to a friend on the phone, and she said she would gladly contribute toward the cost. She asked me to find out the exact cost and post it on Facebook. I did as she suggested and was stunned when someone from my church sent me a message saying she and her husband wanted to pay the entire bill. I did not know this family very well, and they were very willing to pay a $1,500 medical bill on our behalf. I knew our insurance was accepted at the other hospital because my other two children had spent their first week or two of life in that NICU. However when the insurance was notified that we were paying for our son to be transported to the other NICU, they said they wouldn't pay his medical bills at the other hospital because the billing would be too complicated. The medical staff submitted an appeal on the basis that I was providing our baby's milk, and they finally agreed to pay his medical bills at both hospitals. As the explanation of benefit documents began arriving in our mailbox, I was amazed to see that the insurance even paid for our ambulance ride. The Lord used the couple's offer to be the catalyst that brought me closer to the rest of my family, even though in the end they did not need to contribute a dime toward the expense. What a mighty God we serve!
It seems that lately everything I have been reading and hearing in my devotionals, in church, and in conversations has had to do with God's love for us. Most of us who were raised in church have been taught that God loves us, but do we truly comprehend just how great and amazing His love for us is? We are human, with emotions that ebb and flow based on how we are feeling about ourselves, our lives, and how things are going at any given moment, and we tend to view God and His feelings toward us based on our own experiences and emotions. Some days, when we are feeling great, we feel as if our love for God is a 10/10. Then we have a bad day, and may feel that our love is only at a 7/10. Then we begin to believe that His love and feelings work the same way. "I yelled at my husband and kicked the dog today, so God couldn't possibly love me as much right now." My dear friends, we could not be more wrong in our assessment of Him! He loves us with all His heart, soul, mind and strength! His love for us never, ever changes. No matter what. He calls us "Beloved." His love for us is unchanging. If we could only wrap our small human minds around that fact, it would settle so many things in us! I heard a minister say "Keep your eyes fixed on what is unchanging (God's love for you!) and He will settle you." I find that to be so true! When I focus on my failing and fluctuating love and devotion to Him, I struggle with guilt and shame, but when I focus on the fact that He loves me the same no matter where I am in my walk with Him, it settles something deep inside me, and frees me to love Him with abandon and to share that love with others.
We love Him because He first loved us!
Get ready to see a whole new era in healthcare.
I work for a chiropractor. I have seen many lives saved and improved by the three different chiropractors I have worked for over the past 9 years. I have seen insurance laws and changes that make me go, WHAT? Really!? The rejection codes that are being sent for claims lately, don't even make logical sense at times. Yeah, it's becoming interesting.
You have no doubt heard the news, that insurance laws are changing and healthcare requirements are now boarding on the ridiculous. You may be for these changes or against them. Either way, change is coming. I'm not trying to frighten you or tell you something you shouldn't already know. The simple fact is that things on this planet are getting worse and we have already been forewarned in God's word.
About 7 years ago, a gifted friend told me, "one day, the healthcare in this country will not be what it is today. At that time, God's children must rely on Him to care for them, rather then the medical world." Let me think, asking the Great Physician, who made me and knows my inner workings to fix me? Ah hello!! After He says, ask and you will receive, seek & you will find, knock & the door will be open to you! But, but what if God is simply not in the mood to heal you then? One may think, give me western medicine and drugs, or knowledge of natural cures, remedies and vitamins, just in case. Ah, but at that juncture, are those not idols? Something you rely on instead of God your Father? Ouch, that hurts Sonya, don't go there. I am not saying or suggesting that items that have the ability to bring you back to health, weather they be natural or pharmaceutical, are evil. I am merely pointing out, that we, even God's own children, don't rely on Him to care for our mortal bodies as we should, myself included. Instead we rely on the use of what He has created and the knowledge He has given, to help that process along. AHHH, now we're getting it.
God works all things together for good to them that love Him and are called according to His purpose. Even disease, sickness, discomfort and distress over our mortal bodies and their frailty. Sometimes, we rely on the things He has given to heal us, rather then God Himself, to bring about healing and health. We may be removed from some of the items that have helped us in the past, but that isn't always a bad thing. Perhaps God is simply readjusting our focus to be fully on Him, and His power, rather then the knowledge of doctors, pharmaceuticals, natural herbs and supplements to fix our bodies. Hmm, it's just a thought, what if we fully began, before the tough changes occur in healthcare, to trust God? Even begin to ask Him what He would have us do, if anything, other then exercise the faith He has given us? Just a thought......
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